“People assume that most marriages fail because of big bombs—cheating, financial mismanagement, addiction, dishonesty,” says Jessica Elizabeth Opert, a London-based relationship coach. “But the truth is, it’s the small missiles—the everyday action or lack of action—that severs the connection between two people, resulting in a loss of love.”

It seems all fun and games until you actually get married. What people tend to miss out on the most these days is whether or not they are ready to spend their entire life with this same person? At times we demand more independence than our partner is willing to give us; but, the temporary love that we feel for that person overshadows it for some time. This naturally results in cheating on our partner with someone else. Another reason could be interdependence. This is when you feel like your intimacy needs aren’t being met by your partner, which is often visible through poor communication, lack of spark, or feeling unloved.

If you’re answering ‘yes’ to more than six things on this list, it’s definitely time for a talk about your relationship.

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